Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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