people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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