3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
