whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
