I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
