Tell her she can't have a vagina
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
