it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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