I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
