8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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