But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
