2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
