P.S. I can't hear my feet
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
