I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Randomize
