In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
