maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Randomize
