they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
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I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
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There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
These tits shall not be calmed
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
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