I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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