This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
