She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
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