if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Still dying that you shit outside
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
