Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
"it" just moved
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
