Three words: puerto rican gang bang
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
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