So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
I just googled if crying burns calories
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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