Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
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I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
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So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
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