What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Randomize