i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
