okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
