I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
