Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
