he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
