Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
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