haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
