There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
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