I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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