Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
