so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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