Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Randomize
