turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
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