dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
