Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Randomize
