so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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