Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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