did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
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