I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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