There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
