If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
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