she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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