Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Randomize
