So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Randomize
