Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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