im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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